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House Swap needed for this Maine horsewoman
Cabin Fever set in early for friend Ali Brock of Alfred, Maine.
Her mock House Swap advertisement reminded me of a few desperate and humorous episodes:
How cold impacts my mental health
Why We Love Winter
Winter as a Bad Wedding Reception
Sonia's fun with horse blankets
Sonia's fun with hoses
Ali posted this bit:
HOUSE SWAP NEEDED:
Will trade a week (or two) on a snowed-in farm in rural Maine.
a herd of very fuzzy horses
a flock of cranky hens
a ticked-off donkey
and much more...
Act RIGHT NOW
....I will throw in
a side of moose
all the frozen chicken eggs you can handle.
As an Added Bonus
...I will leave the two feet of snow in the driveway so you can actually feel the splendor of what it is truly like to plow snow in a beat-up, old Ford plow truck for your very self...
BUT WAIT....there is STILL more... Call now and I will leave the water in the barn hose to freeze so you can experience true farming....in Maine....in January!
WILL SWAP for...
ANYPLACE with temperatures over 80 degrees
preferably no critters....unless that critter happens to be a colorful parrot... who is perched on my shoulder....while I am drinking a large Margarita...on the beach....in my bikini.
If you are crazy enough to be interested, make sure to pack:
extra strength vitamin D tabs
extra baggy pants as they come in handy with all the extra layers you will need while yer' out tending to my chickens!
PLEASE call soon as Cabin~Fever is a startin' to set in....will leave the 12 gauge loaded in case the coyotes come a callin' at night for added security.
Call 1-800-YOU-R-NUTS to set up a date to house swap with me...Thank you and hope to hear from you REAL SOON!
Ali lives with her husband, James, and two young children. They have have two horses, one miniature donkey, and more.
Ali writes of the other animals not-so-thrilled with winter:
We have a huge Rhodesian Ridgeback who has morphed into a couch cushion as he hates the cold weather. The two "barn" cats really have decided to move indoors...Their real estate of choice is as close to the wood stove as they can get without catching on fire."
View Reader Comments:
I'll Pass!!! :-)
Brilliant ad!!! I feel your pain...running a donkey and mule rescue when the temps are below zero is really not so much fun...Solstice has passed, we're gettin' closer to spring by the hour!!! Hang in!!!!
Come on Ali! Just the other day you called me to go riding on the beach and it was a balmy 30 degrees! The frozen barn hose is a real bummer though... Very inviting ad - hope you get some takers!!
Haha....Maddy, I love the frozen jeans & palm tree pics you added...what a contrast. Amazing what a gallop down the beach will do to restore your soul!! ~Ali
Love your blog post! This made it all the way to Seattle and reminded me of a winter we had a few years back. Hope things are thawing out for you!!! Cheers!
"Anyone who is concerned about his dignity would be well advised to keep away from horses." - Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh
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